Laser Eye Surgery

By Erika Moen on April 10, 2011

On Wednesday I had a second bout of LASIK (laser eye surgery)


About eight months ago I had LASIK done on my eyes for the first time, which improved my life immeasurably. My eyesight went from practically blind (-8/-9) to almost perfect. Let me illustrate how bad that is: objects had to literally be touching my nose in order for them to be in focus. Just talking to someone at a normal distance meant their features were blurred to the point of abstract darker and lighter colors, no actual defined nose, eyes or mouth to identify. The low-level anxiety I used to feel every day, worrying about the completely fucked situation I’d find myself in should anything happen to my glasses or contacts while out and about, has completely evaporated.

As great as my new eyes have been, I’m still having trouble reading street signs when I’m on my bike or the bus. Either I could go get glasses again ooooooor the place where I got my eyes lasered has me covered for any follow up corrections for a year after my initial treatment so I went back under the knife (-er, laser?) to see if we couldn’t get my eyes perfect after all at no additional cost. Hell, we paid enough for it the first time, why not get our full money’s worth, eh?

Even if I’m never 20/20 on my own, this has still been an incredibly positive life-changing surgery for me and I’m super grateful to live in the future where we FIX OUR BODIES WITH LASERS.

DISGUSTING EYE BALL SKEWERING PHOTO BELOW. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

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This is a still from a clandestine video Matt snuck through the observatory room of my eyeball having its flap hooked with that little shepherd’s crook so that it could be pulled back and the lasers could fire into the depths of my window of the soul.

I thought about posting the video (oh my god, it’s pretty horrifying, let’s be honest here), but I’ve decided against it because I don’t wanna get anyone in trouble. Be sated with this horrific screen cap.

Oh, but really, despite how gruesome the above looks, this surgery is SO EASY. It lasted less than five minutes (the lasering was only a matter of seconds!) and the most “pain” I was ever in could only be qualified as “some discomfort” but nothing to even wince over. Hell, I’ve done it twice now and I’m a total wimp! If I can do it, I can assure you it’s not that bad.

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